We have all heard people talking about boundaries but what are these and why are they important. The first step to being able to have better boundaries are to learn about what they are. So here is some information to learn about what they are why they matter and how we can use them. Often domestic violence victims will have problems setting boundaries and I know that for a fact because I have a lot of trouble staying safe enough to set boundaries with others. It does take a lot of work from a victim to be able to do this well and it has taken me years to be able to do it at all. I still have trouble standing up for me and setting boundaries with others. But keep working at this and you will get better and be able to do this in the end. Victims have been violated and their boundaries overcome so this is often a big issuse for victims. Work with a counsellor on this so that you can remove your triggers and are able to do this confidently. It will make a difference when you are able to do this and not get upset or distressed. The first step is to educate yourself about what healthy boundaries are here is the information I give out at my stalls about boundaries. When you are able to set boundaries you will be able to keep yourself safe and be able to stand up for you and your needs. You will not let others abuse you or violate you and will feel ok about looking after your welfare. You will understand about what is your responsibilty and what is not your responsibity. I found it really healing to learn about this because until I got educated I had no idea no one had ever told that there are boundaries.
So what are healthy boundaries?
A healthy person has healthy boundaries. Being able to set boundaries is very important to being able to have a healthy life. It is all part of good mental health and wellbeing. There are different types of boundaries for different situations. For example when you are with your friends and family you should use different boundaries than with a stranger that you don’t know. Everybody needs to set their own boundaries in their life. There are also physical, emotional and psychological boundaries that you can set. Those with good healthy boundaries have a much healthier identity and a sense of self. If you don’t have healthy boundaries others can violate you and your relationships are less healthy.
Moral: Set healthy boundaries so you have good well-being in your life!
Here are some books I have read that talk about this “About boundaries”Dr John Townsend and Dr Henry Cloud ” Where to draw the line How to set healthy Boundaries everyday” Anne Katherine.