Yesterday I was given a Newspaper articel in The Saturday Paper to read that talked about the Sexual Harrasement that happened in the Victoria Police service. How the problem that we had in the police service of the boys club and how they treat females is getting better and improving. That unless all police use respect and intrigity in the right way with females abuse won’t stop. Also for victims that come to report abuse that victims will not feel safe to come forward to report abuse unless it is delt with in a correct way. It talked about how the police treat domestics violence victims better than before and how it is getting better all the time. As the bad behaviour from some men officers is being reported and stopped.  It made me think of all the victims who have come to see me at stalls telling me how the police they saw did not believe or want to help them. So how do we stop domestic violence if the police do not do their job or don’t believe the victims stories.  I would like to give advise as to what has worked for me in this situation.

When the system that is there to protect you does not work it is very overwhelming and upsetting to know what to do! But I would like to give you some tips on what I have done when that happened to me.  How when that happened I wrote letters, I made phone calls and I went to see people in authority because the truth is if you do nothing then nothing changes and the same bad results happen for someone else and the system never improves or gets better. I know how hard it is to make a complaint when the people who are there to help you do nothing or the wrong thing. Its frustrating, its unfair and not right expecially when you are a victim of domestic violence and already feel powerless then you have to fight the system that is there to protect you. Its not ok but necessary sometimes. So no matter how hard it is it is important that when you do not get the support or help that you need that you do something about it. Take a break look after you and your needs but contact someone when you are feeling better could be a support worker for Domestic violence, a case worker who will work with you to get what you need done. Could be a family or friend who will support you and go with you or help you write a letter or make a phone call. Maybe contact agoverning body or Domestic violence agency to report what happened but do something. When you have calmed down write a factual message on the facebook page asking for help or go to another police station for help. See the commander or  Sergeant at the station you went to about the problem. But you need to do something to change or report the bad service so that it improves.

Most of the police are fantastic and I have meet some really lovely kind caring police men and women in my time. It’s a very hard job they do and they put their life on the line for us. But when they do the wrong thing no one wins and by you doing nothing about it every body loses. Some times police do get it wrong maybe they are over worked  having a bad day, lazy or don’t care, burnt out and should not be in that job or not experienced enough to deal with it.  What ever the reason doesnt matter but you need to speak up and say something about the problem.

One of the things I did after the abuse happened to me and it went wrong was I spoke up after my rape trial  I spoke up when I was told to go away after no one wanted to take my rape statement. I went to see a MP about how the system treated me and made me feel through all the terrible abuse and toture I went through and the many failing of the system to protect me.This MP Tanya Plibersek for family and community services  sat me down and went through every thing that happened to me and what government department is incharge of that system so that changes got made in parliment. I was in a womens magazaine Take 5 to talk about my experience as a rape and domestic violence victim asking other rape victime to come forward and to report rape.  I was in the newspaper telegraph twice as to how the system treats rape victims how it needs to change, that how it is now is damaging victims and retraumatising them and I was one of the victims they used to show that changes needs to take place.  I went to see the domestic violence prevention team and steps where taken to improve procedures for victims like me. I went to the police college to educate detectives on how rape victims feel and what they need to feel better and to get healing.  I went to the Attorney General to tell my story after being in a witness box and completely violated and reabused as a result they were so upset as to how I was treated changes were made for rape victims in the witness box.  I wrote my bio on my journey as a domestic violence victim detail by detail so that a complete understanding of how I felt and what I needed was understood and more changes were made . As a result of my speaking out changes were made to the system through all these government departments and agencies to make it better for others. Also I got the help I needed because when it is done right it is healing and empowering to make statements and stand up and to stop domestic violence against you. So as hard as it is we all need to speak out when we see or hear of Domestic Violence and the correct procdures not done for the victim so that things work better. My final advice is to not give up and to keep speaking out because sometimes it takes time for change to happen but don’t give up and keep working on it. If all else fails there is the law enforcement command GPO Box 3880 Sydney 2001 which deals with complaints about police.

Moral: Make it safe for victims to speak about or report Domestic Violence so that it stops!